Going home for the holidays

Coming to university grants everyone some much needed independence from their parents, which at first is the best thing imaginable. You can stay out whenever you want, eat whatever you want, and there are no siblings around to annoy or distract you. Now, you can procrastinate in your own way, rather than having the distraction of family.


Despite all of its positives, this independence does however make going back home for holidays all the more tense, as your new independence clashes with your parents’ habits of taking care of you. Of course not all things about going home are negatives. Suddenly you do not have to do your own washing again, things actually get ironed and there is a warm cooked meal for you every night without so much as a phone call to Domino’s Pizza. And, of course, you get to see your lovely family who you have missed so much in your time away.

But the tension between university students and their parents in the holidays can lead to horrible arguments, even over the smallest things. Luckily, most of this bickering is 100% avoidable.

Managing your time whilst at home can be one of the most stressful elements of the holiday. You want to see your friends, yet your parents insist you spend as much time with them as physically possible. That’s not to mention that you have revision to do for those dreaded exams at the end of the academic year.

The trick, as with most things in life, is balance. Organise specific things to do with your parents, then, in the time you do not have anything planned, you can still get on with your own thing. When they start nagging about your work, you can swiftly tell them that you have a plan of when to work and not to, and that you are going to stick to it.

When it comes to being at home, it is a chance to prove your independence from your parents. Although they may still take care of you, you can offer to do the washing up or something small. Expecting them to continue to take care of you exactly like they did when you were in school will just increase their belief that you cannot cope without them and increase the nagging. Asserting yourself can do wonders for your relationship, and can finally help them to start seeing you as an adult in your own right.

Holidays at university are times to be treasured. They offer precious time to see those that have spread to all over the country, and they are not a time you should waste. Whether you spend your entire break at home or visiting your new university friends in their home towns, do not let it be ruined by petty arguments with the parents. They want to see how you have grown up, too, and are just grateful to have you home.


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August 2022
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