Gaming, Venue

Losing my Pokemon virginity

I’m not ashamed to admit that I’ve never owned a hand-held games console, my family just couldn’t afford to get me that much-desired PlayGame Boy Cube 360. That’s right, I know nothing about console gaming. So imagine my joy when my friends all pitched in to get me a 2DS for my 21st birthday, Pokémon Omega Ruby downloaded onto it and ready to go. Again, not ashamed to admit that I cried.

So in order to commemorate this auspicious loss of my gaming console virginity, I’d like to give you my first impressions of playing on a 2DS. It’s alright for some people, they’ve owned Nintendo products for years and can just pick up any version and be a natural. I’m sitting there two hours later, confused as to which button is A or Y, and getting overly-excited about the circle pad (because seriously that thing is so fun to use, it’s like a little wobbly button).

First of all, this thing is adorable. It’s small and perfectly formed, with two wee screens. Loading up Pokémon was far too exciting, I loved watching the chunky, red Pokémon revolving on the bottom screen to the theme tune (Dougie says it’s called Groudon, I’m trusting him here). Pressing START to begin my adventure, I was getting butterflies in my stomach. It dawned on me that this would commence the long, slippery slope to buying forty quid games every few months, and trying not to become obsessed with collecting every item whilst simultaneously completing every side quest. Nevertheless, I made Torchic my starter, and after naming it Kenny (as a massive bird nerd, I couldn’t resist Kenny’s adorable beady eyes), I decided to go and potter about the town. From years of stealing my cousin’s console while she slept to play on Animal Crossing, the little blocky houses and wandering interactive NPCs were a blast from the past.

I was sure that I’d gone overboard when I caught myself rummaging through every patch of long grass that I could find, trying to beef Kenny up as much as possible – but apparently this is a normal thing to do according to my game-wise friends.

Not a huge fan of this Brendan chap, I don’t care that his dad is Birch and a big-wig expert on Pokémon. My mistrust of him began when he looked out at me from the screen with his soulless grey eyes and said ‘I wasn’t expecting a girl’. I got my revenge by utterly annihilating him and his Mudkip in my first trainer battle. I thought his big ego might have deflated after that soul-destroying defeat but no, he continued to sass me throughout the session. Looks like a healthy rivalry is blossoming there.

So I haven’t got awfully far, heaven knows I have a lot to learn. I’m more of an Overwatch and Civ 5 sort of gal since buying a laptop, and I certainly always drive the wrong way down the course of every Mario Kart game. But for all my well-deserved title of ‘n00b’, I try bloody hard to be the very best that I can be. Like no-one ever was. I mean, to catch them is my real test, and to train them? Well, that’s my cause.


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September 2021
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