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Ten Signs that You are Growing Up

Regardless of where you are in your university education, if you’re anything like me, you repeatedly find yourself feeling increasingly old. Whether you’re in first year, finding you can’t face as much alcohol as you could last semester, a second year feeling rather house-proud, or a third year experiencing how traumatic it will be to enter the real world, it’s safe to say that university is the prime time for maturing.

wineaisle

This of course does not apply to everyone, and there will always be those who spent all three years surviving off ready meals. However no longer being a teenager puts some of us into a little quarter-life-crisis, so here are ten ways that show us we are indeed growing up. Either that, or becoming incredibly boring…

1. Not only owning a slow cooker, but also using it regularly and devoting a Pinterest board to slow cooker recipes… Worse still, using ‘Mum’s slow-cooked BBQ chicken’ as that recipe you can always fall back on when you lack inspiration.

2. Spending a substantial amount of shopping time perusing the wine aisle, carefully selecting a few bottles of red to suit your current wine phase (mine is South African at the moment), and refusing to spend less than £6 because cheap wine just doesn’t hit the spot anymore. Consequently, discovering a terrifying secret… that a bottle can actually last more than just one evening.

3. Using words like ‘perusing’, ‘idiosyncratic’ and ‘fastidious’ during everyday conversation in a very nonchalant manner.

4. Noting that Dysons are the Ferraris of the hoover world, because the Henry your landlord provided is simply far too below average to cater for your OCD tendencies. Nevertheless, determinedly using it to vacuum the coving, because the sheer amount of dust that defies gravity makes you want to cry.

5. Actually taking your makeup off at night. Netflix has a pause button, so there really is no excuse.

6. Using your day off as a day to try out the cleaning tips you saw on Pinterest. Then sharing the glass-cleaning benefits of white vinegar with anyone and everyone who will and won’t listen.

7. Speaking of Pinterest, (this may apply to girls only), making a board for everything that may never occur in life. Planning your entire non-existent wedding, hoarding ‘fitspiration’ ideas you will never look at again, and pinning craft ideas you will never make. This is what we call ‘grown-up procrastination’, and you may be shocked to know it is no more productive than that time you watched the whole of Desperate Housewives within three weeks in first year. Unless of course, you have a board full of cleaning tips.

8. Seeing your Facebook feed fill up with engagements and weddings, especially around Christmas time. Scarier still when it’s people younger than you.

9. Going to your parents for advice because you realise that they genuinely are right 99% of the time. And on this note, discovering that you will become your parents. Whether it be by inheriting your dad’s hairline or your mum’s unique way of folding socks.

10. Disappointedly finding that things which excited you as a child are slightly underwhelming to you now. For example, Christmas and birthdays are no longer quite as magical. Yet, things that underwhelmed you as a child give you a fleeting flicker of excitement now. For instance, fresh sheets, the new sponge in the sink and the fact that someone else already emptied the bins.

If you can relate to any of these moments, I salute you. If you have no idea what I’m talking about, keep your wits about you, it will happen.

25/02/2014

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The University of East Anglia’s official student newspaper. Concrete is in print and online.

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