Fashion, OldVenue

The Return of the Speedo

I know what you’re all thinking. The person who wrote this must be crazy. However, Speedos are something that have unfairly been forced out of fashion. Not too long ago, it was common for a man to wander onto the beach in his budgie smugglers. Whereas now if you’re seen wearing Speedos you are shunned to the far end of the beach, where your only companion will be a piece of drift wood. As last summer proved to us all the summers are FINALLY getting hotter. With this in mind, Speedos may make a comeback this season!


3761180891_c71e8a919e_oPhoto: Flick – Why-NoT

Whilst women have been able to wear swimwear that can be incredibly provocative over the past few decades, us men have been forced to wear board shorts. And why is this? Perhaps, it is the social stigma that surrounds them that frightens us away. They have gone from being worn by young men with athletic physiques to old, obese men who resemble the missing link. Others seem to associate Speedos with the gay community. This is ridiculous. What is so wrong with being comfortable and cool on the beach? Board shorts are heavy and make you blend in with the crowd. Whereas in Speedos, you not only look the part, but your gonads will thank you for the support. Trust me, Speedos are an absolute God send.

Contemporary fashion is all about being true to yourself, and embracing your individuality. However, this only seems to apply to women as men never seem to be considered. Why can’t men be told that they can be this confident on the beach? It’s bizarre! You will often see a woman who perhaps shouldn’t be wearing a certain bikini because of her age but she has the confidence to do so. Yet many men will stick to hiding behind back at the sun loungers, wearing their baggy t-shirts and board shorts because they haven’t been given the confidence to bear all.

In terms of beachwear, women have been liberated. But if anything, men’s beachwear fashion, in terms of how liberal it is, has gone backwards. So come on chaps, ditch the board shorts, whip out the Speedos, and give the fashion police the finger.


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2 COMMENTS ON THIS POST To “The Return of the Speedo”

  1. After getting involved in triathalon, I saw the sense that the swim brief “Speedo” made for pool and open water swimming. After trying nearly every type of square leg and jammer type, without satisfaction, I tried on one low rise brief…. Comfort at last! There are frequent murmers and the occassional compliment, but most folks do not get fussy—not that I am going to cater to them anyway… Many men comment that they wish they had the confidence to pull it off….

  2. I’ve been wearing speedos for the last 10 years and I love them. I refuse to let fashion dictate what I find comfortable and enjoyable to wear. For the most part, I’ve had nothing but positive comments on my choice of swimwear. If we all wore the same thing, the world would be a boring place. Long live the speedo!

September 2021
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